A Letter To Your Penis

Dude, we need to have a talk. It's about...your penis.

You see, I've spent a great deal of my time getting to know you. I've comforted you, I've cooked for you, I've laughed with you, I've confided in you, I've even slept in the same bed with you. I've been your friend.

All of this time, I have been aware of the fact that you have a penis and that, well, I don't. There have been times, I will admit, that I have been more aware of your weenie than others. Most of those times have been fleeting. I have made a conscious effort, in fact, to weigh my options - do I want your penis, or do I want your friendship? Penis? Friendship? Penis? Friendship! Every. Single. Time. Friendship won out. Because I know, with you, it's one or the other, although this is not necessarily the case with everyone (Oh, GOD, I hope to hell it's not the case with everyone).

  At any rate, the subject was never broached, because all of my actions towards you were the actions of a friend. All of the love I have expressed for you...it was not a love for your penis. It was a love for you. Who you essentially are, and all that you bring to my life. In fact, it's actually heartbreaking to me that after all this time we have spent together, and after all of the barriers we have seemingly broken down. We get this far...and suddenly it's all about your penis. I feel like you have cut my tongue right out of my mouth, in fact. Thinking back on every time I have offered you encouragement, love, and support...now takes the shape of me, tongue lolling out and my hands busy in a thwarted attempt to cop a feel. I can't even tell you how much that saddens me. And hurts. Of all the ways I have touched you...you are now deciding that our friendship hinges on a way that I have not even attempted to touch you.

And, quite honestly...I know you are a dude, and this might be difficult for you to fathom, but even if I DID want your penis, I have the power to not act on that desire. I have the power, as stated above, to weigh a fleeting desire for your penis against the foundations of a long-lasting Friendship that I was (I thought WE were) attempting to build, brick by painfuckstaking brick (and let's not even get into the whole concept of being "just" friends - because none of my friends are "just" anything) and to choose to interact with you honestly and without any of the bullshit that generally comes up when men and women choose to allow themselves to be vulnerable with each other.

And that's another thing. I don't think you realized (and perhaps I bear some responsibility for this) how close I allowed myself to be to you. You might want to think about the implications of someone, particularly someone with my history, anyone in. Trusting. Not even giving it a second thought. Not demanding. Not expecting. Not fearing. I mean, I thank you for that healing. Totally. I totally thank you, but you need to know that wasn't easy for me, either. And you need to pull your head out of your penis long enough to understand that what I've given you means more than a blowjob you want so badly. And what you have given to me amounts to more than just a cheap feel.